Sometimes.

For a very long time I have struggled with friendships. I am one of those people that throws their entire being into each relationship. For years upon years, no one has invited me anywhere. If I wanted to do anything, I would be the initiator. I've missed my share of school days due to common colds and cancer over the years. I waited and waited for someone to tell me they missed me and no one did, until yesterday. Since then, I have found a new sense of hope in friendship. Of course these two people are close friends, one of them being my absolute best friend who I would fight til the death for. You know exactly who you are, and I love you :)! You have no idea what little things mean to me, especially the things that I do for other people that I think go unnoticed. Thank you for noticing.

Also, a small shout out to the people that make my world go 'round:
My Mom. My dad. Nathan Jent. Elizabeth Batson. Gabby Norris. Connor Clinch. Devin Drummond. Erika Jackson. Tyler Silvers. Austin Jent. Cody Jent. Shannon Theobald. Mary Miles Fewell. Jessica Mason. Jenai Jackson. Phillip Brown. Caroline Tunkle. Kristen Ayers. Lauren Patterson. Jared Stroud. Caiti Maddox. CJ Patterson. Mr. Henderson. Mr. Hoeberling. Hochey. Unterspan. and Andrew Ginzel.

You are my favorites.

btw, I made that picture from scratch, so don't steal it.

Counting Days: A Tale of Mishaps

Straying rays

counting days

by labelled pills

sleep walking

silent talking

lacking any thrills

alive at noon

tired too soon

wasting precious time

drowning sorrows

chasing tomorrows

with vodka and lime

chubby cheeks

18 weeks

what did i do?

flaming passion

tacky fashion

a night spent with you

missed a day

ran away

stubborn and confused

all alone

not even grown

broken and abused

lying on the floor

wishing for no more

at the end of the rope

tying a knot

she's all I've got

a newfound sense of hope

The Hallway

Connecting rooms of memories

with tattered curtains

and shattered mirrors

worn out carpet and dusty windowsills

sending chills up the spirit's spine

light peeks in

looking for a friend

but finds emptiness

music lines the walls

floating down the hall

a cavernous darkness

curiosity killed the cat

in order to get out

chase away the doubt

when this becomes that

old newspapers

misfit toys

grown up girls

and grown up boys

gone to face

a material world

hatred and fear begins to swirl

in the heart of light

overcoming night

green moss

the only sign of life

echoes through the stone

a never-ending hallway

a chill beneath the bone.

Musical Chairs

Tiny travelers in the night

eyes awake and glowing bright

far from fear and far from fright

flashing greens of traffic lights

silence broken, ears are ringing

due to all the prior singing

followed by short, timid mingling

new, loving feelings thoughts are bringing

intrigued by an open spirit

far too late for them to hear it

leg warmers, cupcakes, microphones

I'm glad I didn't stay at home

moving, swaying to the beat

unable to stop the flow through my feet

X's on the backs of hands

twisting, turning where I stand

living in a musical land

compelled by an amazing band

eyes are drooping, fighting off sleep

this night is one that I will keep

I'm diving off into the deep

dreaming of concerts without a peep

there cannot be me without you

and this something that remains true.

Night of Epiphany

Bright eyes in the night

turning left, turning right

wind playing with my hair
cruising down the road nowhere

hopes and dreams still swirling round

before they tumble to the ground

music pulsing through my veins

the only thing that keeps me sane

tomorrow's almost yesterday

Bright eyes in the night

my future's out of sight

choices here and choices there

now my hope's drowning in despair

do i leave or do i stay

pressure causing my dismay

when I'm there how will i know

if what's right is what i chose

will we break or will we save

tomorrow's almost in the grave

Can't stop time from closing in

Can't escape original sin

give it up and let it go

but it's tied into a bow

pull the strings, untie the knot

Tomorrow's something I forgot.

Exercise

Oreos, ice cream, cellulitic thighs

looks like it's about time to exercise

home gyms, yoga mats, exercise ball

don't you answer that sugar cookie's call

wrong scales, five pounds, the camera adds weight

your diet attitude is turning irate

microwave dinners, $20 a month

you feel like its about time to give up

sweat drops, gym shorts, fancy tennis shoes

the cheesy workout video blues

don't give up on your healthy race

feel the burn and pick up the pace!

December Rhapsody

A world of ice, a heart of stone
how it aches to be alone.
Earth is sleeping, flowers chilled

wolves are howling, surging thrills.

Skin is rosy, bones are cold

eyes of rapture, wings unfold

children laughing at a snowman's expense

they'll be melting ever since.

Timid beings hide inside

"it'll be alright," their companions lie

Attempt moving on from a love lost

about as hard as a winter's frost

Wrongfully deemed a case of charity

walking away left a winter in me.